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Chinese etiquette in many ways is just common sense good behavior however it is still unique to China
and not to be confused with other Asian cultures. Also, the etiquette I describe is basic to the country as
a whole and does not take into account etiquette practised by the hundreds of minority groups in China.
One thing you should remember and that is, you will be forgiven many etiquette blunders that you no
doubt will initiate, so don't worry too much about it, however, the Chinese people will be very impressed
if you show some knowledge of and practise good Chinese etiquette.
Always be polite and use good grooming habits. The Chinese are very big on this. Also, they have a habit
of staring at foreigners, but don't take this as aggressive behavior. They are only curious as most have
never seen an American or European up close before. I just ignore it and I suggest you do the same.
Always remember that you are a guest in their country, and a representative of this country. It's kind of
like being a mini-ambassador. They will watch you closely for many things. Your attitude towards them,
your actions, your reactions, your temperament, and your ability to adapt to their culture. They are a
very proud people with a culture thousands of years old. They deserve respect, so try and keep that in
mind. If you look at them through their culture and not yours, you will have a great time.
The Chinese people will nod or bow slightly as an initial greeting. Handshakes are also popular but wait
for your Chinese counterpart to initiate the gesture. If you visit a school, theater, or other workplace, it
is likely that you will be greeted with applause as a sign of welcome. Respond by applauding back. Try to
avoid making expansive gestures and using unusual facial expressions. The Chinese do not use their
hands when speaking, and will only become annoyed with a speaker who does. Some hand gestures,
however, are necessary. To summon attention, turn your palm down, waving your fingers toward
yourself. Use your whole hand rather than your index finger to point.
Chinese people do not like being touched, especially if they are older or in positions of authority. This of
course can change once you become a family member or good friend. When meeting for the first time
acknowledge the most senior person in a group first. Holding hands in public is ok but other displays of
affection, like kissing or hugging is generally not accepted. Do not put your hands in your mouth, as it is
considered vulgar. Consequently, when in public, avoid biting your nails, removing food from your teeth,
and similar practices. Pushing is common in lineups. Spitting in public is acceptable. Blowing your nose
with a handkerchief is also acceptable.
As far as dress code goes, casual clothes are acceptable everywhere, although smarter clothes can gain
more respect. Revealing clothes should be avoided. Most times Chinese people are not forthcoming with
information unless they are specifically asked for it, so be prepared to ask direct questions to get the
information you need. Locals may not even speak honestly but will try to say what they think you want to
hear. This is not done maliciously and an element of patience and understanding will ease the situation.
Chinese people are courteous but reserved and politeness is appreciated at all times. Don't always be
fooled by a smile as this can mean that the person is upset or embarrassed and try to avoid
confrontational situations that may cause a loss of "face". Confrontation is not appreciated and will only
worsen rather than resolve any situation.
Although customs and the kinds of food eaten vary according to region, it is most common for Chinese
families to gather for three meals a day. In some areas and at some times of the year, laborers may have
only two full meals a day, but when possible, they supplement these with up to three smaller ones, often
taken at tea houses. There is not, in general, the strong association we have in the West between the
type of food and the time of day it should be served (say, eggs for breakfast, a sandwich for lunch, pot
roast for dinner). The sorts of dishes served at the two or three main meals are pretty much the same.
The goal in planning, however, is to provide a number of dishes at each meal, so that, rather than
experiencing difference by comparison between one meal and the next, each meal includes, in itself, a
satisfying array of elements. The Stuff of the Meal The center of the Chinese meal is fan, or grain. So
much so that the meal itself is called hsia fan, "a period of grain." In the South and among urban families
in other areas, the fan may be rice or rice products, but rice is expensive, as is the wheat eaten in the
North in the form of cooked whole grains, noodles, or bread. Depending on the region, then, less
prosperous families might make their meals of millet, sorghum, or corn. The meats and vegetables we
think of as the focus of the meal are known as ts'ai, which means something like "side dishes".
An individual place setting for an everyday meal includes a bowl of fan, a pair of chopsticks, a
flat-bottomed soupspoon, and a saucer. Instead of a napkin, a hot towel is often provided at the end of
the meal for the diner to wipe his hands and mouth. The meat and vegetable dishes are laid out all at once
in the center of the table, and the diners eat directly from the communal plates using their chopsticks.
Soup is also eaten from the common bowl. Rather than for serving oneself a separate portion, the saucer
is used for bones and shells or as a place to rest a bite taken from a communal plate when it is too large
to eat all at once. It is perfectly acceptable to reach across the table to take a morsel from a far-away
dish. Who eats when and how eating begins is in order of seniority, with each diner taking the cue to start
from his or her immediate superior. Children are taught to eat equally from each ts'ai dish in turn, never
betraying a preference for a particular item by eating more of it, never seeming to pause to choose a
specific bite from the plate. In order to cool the soup a bit and to better diffuse the flavor in the mouth,
soup is eaten by sipping from the spoon while breathing in. This method, of course, produces the slurping
noise that is taboo in the west. To eat fan, a diner raises the bowl to her lips and pushes the grains into
her mouth with chopsticks. This is the easiest way to eat it and shows proper enjoyment. The diner must
finish all the fan. To leave even a grain is considered bad manners, a lack of respect for the labor
required to produce it. It is fair to say that the number one pastime in China is eating.
Although your Chinese host will not expect you to know everything about proper banquet behavior, he
will greatly appreciate it when you are displaying some knowledge of the subject, because it shows that
you have respect for Chinese culture, etiquette and traditions. Banquets are usually held in restaurants in
private rooms that have been reserved for the purpose. All members of your delegation should arrive
together and on time. You will be met at the door and escorted to the banquet room, where the hosts are
likely to have assembled. Traditionally, and as in all situations, the head of your delegation should enter
the room first. Do not be surprised if your hosts greet you with a loud round of applause. The proper
response is to applaud back. Seating arrangements, which are based on rank, are stricter than in the
West. This is another reason why you should give your host a list of delegation members and their rank.
Guests should never assume that they may sit where they please and should wait for hosts to guide them
to their places. Traditionally, the Chinese regard the right side as the superior and the left side as the
inferior. Therefore on formal occasions, including meetings and banquets, the host invariably arranges for
the main guests to sit on his right side. It is the host's responsibility to serve the guests and at very formal
banquets people do not begin to eat until the principal host served a portion to the principal guest. Or, the
host may simply raise his chopsticks and announce that eating has begun. After this point, one may serve
oneself any food in any amount, although it is rude to dig around in a dish in search of choice portions.
Remember to go slow on eating. Don't fill yourself up when five courses are left to go. To stop eating in
the middle of a banquet is rude, and your host may incorrectly think that something has been done to
offend you. Drinking takes an important place in Chinese banquets. Toasting is mandatory, and the
drinking of spirits commences only after the host has made a toast at the beginning of the meal. It is
likely that he will stand and hold his glass out with both hands while saying a few words. When he says the
words gan bei, which means bottoms up (literally empty glass), all present should drain their glasses.
After this initial toast, drinking and toasting are open to all. Subsequent toasts can be made from person
to person or to the group as a whole. No words are needed to make a toast, and it is not necessary to
drain your glass, although to do so is more respectful. Remember that hard liquor should never be drunk
alone. If you are thirsty, you can sip beer or a soft drink individually, but if you prefer to drink hard
liquor, be sure to catch the eye of someone at your table, smile and raise your glass, and drink in unison.
Beer or soft drinks can also be used for toasting. Also, it is impolite to fill your own glass without first
filling glasses of all others. This applies to all drinks and not just to alcohol. If your glass becomes empty
and your host is observant, it is likely that he will fill it for you immediately. When filling another's glass,
it is polite to fill it as full as you can without having the liquid spill over the rim. This symbolizes full
respect and friendship. It is a matter of courtesy for the host to try to get his guests drunk. If you do not
intend to drink alcohol, make it known at the very beginning of the meal to prevent embarrassment. Even
then, the host may good-naturedly try to push you into drinking. One way to eliminate this pressure is to
tell your host that you are allergic to alcohol. In the course of drinking at banquets, it is not unusual for
some Chinese to become quite drunk, although vomiting or falling down in public entails loss of face.
After a few rounds of heavy drinking, you may notice your hosts excusing themselves to the bathroom,
from whence they often return a bit lighter and reborn for more toasting! When the last dish is finished,
the banquet has officially ended. There is little ceremony involved with its conclusion. The host may ask if
you have eaten your fill, which you undoubtedly will have done. Then the principal host will rise, signaling
that the banquet has ended. Generally, the principal host will bid good evening to everyone at the door
and stay behind to settle the bill with the restaurant. Other hosts usually accompany guests to their
vehicles and remain outside waving until the cars have left the premises. After you have been entertained
by your Chinese associates, it is proper to return the favor unless time or other constraints make it
impossible. A good time to have a return banquet is on the eve of your departure from China or at the
conclusion of the business at hand.
Chinese people consider gifts an important part in showing courtesy.
It is appropriate to give gifts on occasions such as festival, birthday, wedding, or visiting a patient. If you
are invited to a family party, small gifts like wine, tea, cigarettes, or candies are welcomed. Also fruit,
pastries, and flowers are a safe choice. As to other things, you should pay a little attention to the cultural
differences. Contrary to Westerners, odd numbers are thought to be unfortunate. So wedding gifts and
birthday gifts for the aged are always sent in pairs for the old saying goes that blessings come in pairs.
Though four is an even number, it reads like death in Chinese so avoid that. A gift of a clock sounds like
you're attending another's funeral so it is also taboo. As connected with death and sorrow, black and
white are also the last in the choice. Gift giving is unsuitable in public except for some souvenirs. Your
good intentions or gratitude should be given priority to but not the value of the gifts. Otherwise the
receiver may mistake it for a bribe.
Shown below are the traditional festivals and official political holidays you
should be aware of. If you will be traveling during one of the major traditional
festivals you should plan ahead and make reservations for lodging well in
advance of your departure date.
(See descriptions below)
SPRING FESTIVAL
Begins Feb. 7, 2008
LANTERN FESTIVAL
February 15th
DRAGON BOAT FESTIVAL
May 5th
QINGMING FESTIVAL
April 4th
DOUBLE SEVENTH FESTIVAL
July 7th
MID-AUTUMN FESTIVAL
September 25th
DOUBLE NINTH FESTIVAL
September 9th
WINTER SOLSTICE FESTIVAL
December 22nd
International Women's Day
(March 8)
Tree-Planting Day
(April 1)
International Labor Day
(May 1)
Youth Day
(May 4)
Children's Day
(June 1)
The CCP's Birthday
(July 1)
Army's Day
(August 1)
Teacher's Day
(September 10)
National Day
(October 1)
The Spring Festival is the most important festival for the Chinese people and is when all family members get together, just like
Christmas in the West. All people living away from home go back, becoming the busiest time for transportation systems of
about half a month from the Spring Festival. Airports, railway stations and long-distance bus stations are crowded with home
returnees.
People attach great importance to Spring Festival Eve. At that time, all family members eat dinner together. The meal is more
luxurious than usual. Dishes such as chicken, fish and bean curd cannot be excluded, for in Chinese, their pronunciations,
respectively "ji", "yu" and "doufu," mean auspiciousness, abundance and richness. After the dinner, the whole family will sit
together, chatting and watching TV. In recent years, the Spring Festival party broadcast on China Central Television Station
(CCTV) is essential entertainment for the Chinese both at home and abroad. According to custom, each family will stay up to
see the New Year in.
Waking up on New Year, everybody dresses up. First they extend greetings to their parents. Then each child will get money as
a New Year gift, wrapped up in red paper. People in northern China will eat jiaozi, or dumplings, for breakfast, as they think
"jiaozi" in sound means "bidding farewell to the old and ushering in the new". Also, the shape of the dumpling is like gold
ingot from ancient China. So people eat them and wish for money and treasure.
The Lantern Festival falls on the 15th day of the 1st lunar month, usually in February or March in the Gregorian calendar. As
early as the Western Han Dynasty (206 BC-AD 25), it had become a festival with great significance.
This day's important activity is watching lanterns. Throughout the Han Dynasty (206 BC-AD 220), Buddhism flourished in China.
One emperor heard that Buddhist monks would watch sarira, or remains from the cremation of Buddha's body, and light
lanterns to worship Buddha on the 15th day of the 1st lunar month, so he ordered to light lanterns in the imperial palace and
temples to show respect to Buddha on this day. Later, the Buddhist rite developed into a grand festival among common
people and its influence expanded from the Central Plains to the whole of China.
Today, the lantern festival is still held each year around the country. Lanterns of various shapes and sizes are hung in the
streets, attracting countless visitors. Children will hold self-made or bought lanterns to stroll with on the streets, extremely
excited. In the daytime of the Festival, performances such as a dragon lantern dance, a lion dance, a land boat dance, a
yangge dance, walking on stilts and beating drums while dancing will be staged. On the night, except for magnificent lanterns,
fireworks form a beautiful scene.
The Dragon Boat Festival, the 5th day of the 5th lunar month, has had a history of more than 2,000 years.
There are many legends about the evolution of the festival, the most popular of which is in commemoration of Qu Yuan
(340-278 BC). Qu Yuan was minister of the State of Chu and one of China's earliest poets. In face of great pressure from the
powerful Qin State, he advocated enriching the country and strengthening its military forces so as to fight against the Qin.
However, he was opposed by aristocrats headed by Zi Lan, and later deposed and exiled by King Huai. In his exiled days, he
still cared much for his country and people and composed immortal poems including Li Sao (The Lament), Tian Wen (Heavenly
Questions) and Jiu Ge (Nine Songs).
In 278 BC, he heard the news that Qin troops had finally conquered Chu's capital, so he finished his last piece Huai Sha
(Embracing Sand) and plunged himself into the Miluo River, clasping his arms to a large stone. After his death, the people of
Chu crowded to the bank of the river to pay their respects to him. The fishermen sailed their boats up and down the river to
look for his body. People threw into the water zongzi (pyramid-shaped glutinous rice dumplings wrapped in reed or bamboo
leaves) and eggs to divert possible fish or shrimp from attacking his body. An old doctor poured a jug of reaglar wine (Chinese
liquor seasoned with realgar) into the water, hoping to turn all aquatic beasts drunk. That's why people later followed the
customs such as dragon boat racing, eating zongzi and drinking realgar wine on that day.
The Qingming Festival sees a combination of sadness and happiness.
This is the most important day of sacrifice. Both the Han and minority ethnic groups at this time offer sacrifices to their
ancestors and sweep the tombs of the diseased. Also, they will not cook on this day and only cold food is served.
On each Qingming Festival, all cemeteries are crowded with people who came to sweep tombs and offer sacrifices. Traffic on
the way to the cemeteries becomes extremely jammed. The customs have been greatly simplified today. After slightly sweeping
the tombs, people offer food, flowers and favorites of the dead, then burn incense and paper money and bow before the
memorial tablet.
In contrast to the sadness of the tomb sweepers, people also enjoy hope of Spring on this day. The Qingming Festival is a time
when the sun shines brightly, the trees and grass become green and nature is again lively. Since ancient times, people have
followed the custom of Spring outings. At this time tourists are everywhere.
The Qingming Festival is also a time to plant trees, for the survival rate of saplings is high and trees grow fast later. In the
past, the Qingming Festival was called "Arbor Day". But since 1979, "Arbor Day" was settled as March 12 according to the
Gregorian calendar.
The Double Seventh Festival is in mid-summer when the weather is warm and and is based on a beautiful love story.
Long, long ago, there was a kind-hearted fellow named Niu Lang (Cowhand). He lived by himself herding cattle and farming.
One day, a fairy from heaven Zhi Nu (Weaver Maid) fell in love with him and came down secretly to earth and married him. The
cowhand farmed in the field and the Weaver Maid wove at home. They lived a happy life and gave birth to a boy and a girl.
Unfortunately, the God of Heaven soon found out and ordered the Queen Mother of the Western Heavens to bring the Weaver
Maid back.
The Cowhand flew to heaven with his son and daughter and at the time when he was about to catch up with his wife, the Queen
Mother took off one of her gold hairpins and made a stroke. One billowy river appeared in front of the Cowhand. The Cowhand
and Weaver Maid were separated on the two banks forever. Their loyalty to love touched magpies, so tens of thousands of
magpies came to build a bridge for the Cowhand and Weaver Maid to meet each other. The Queen Mother eventually allowed
them to meet each year on the 7th of the 7th lunar month. Hence their meeting date has been called "Qi Xi" (Double Seventh).
Today the legend of the Cowhand and Weaver Maid has taken root in the hearts of the people and is celebrated as the
Valentine's Day in China.
This festival has a long history. In ancient China, emperors followed the rite of offering sacrifices to the sun in spring and to
the moon in autumn. Historical books of the Zhou Dynasty had had the word "Mid-Autumn". Later aristocrats and literary figures
helped expand the ceremony to common people. They enjoyed the full, bright moon on that day, worshipped it and expressed
their thoughts and feelings under it. By the Tang Dynasty (618-907), the Mid-Autumn Festival had been fixed, which became
even grander in the Song Dynasty (960-1279). In the Ming (1368-1644) and Qing (1644-1911) dynasties, it grew to be a major
festival of China.
People in different places follow various customs, but all show their love and longing for a better life. Today people will enjoy
the full moon and eat moon cakes during this time. It is a season when crops and fruits are all ripe and the weather is pleasant.
On the Mid-Autumn Festival, all family members or friends meet outside, putting food on tables and looking up at the sky while
talking about life.
The 9th day of the 9th lunar month is the traditional Chongyang Festival, or Double Ninth Festival. It usually falls in October in
the Gregorian calendar. In an ancient and mysterious book Yi Jing, or The Book of Changes, number "6" was thought to be of
Yin character, meaning feminine or negative, while number "9" was thought to be Yang, meaning masculine or positive. So the
number nine in both month and day create the Double Ninth Festival, or Chongyang Festival. Chong in Chinese means
"double." Also, as double ninth was pronounced the same as the word to signify "forever", both are "Jiu Jiu," the Chinese
ancestors considered it an auspicious day worth celebration. That's why ancient Chinese began to celebrate this festival long
time ago.
On this day, people will eat Double Ninth Gao (or Cake). In Chinese, gao (cake) has the same pronunciation with gao (height).
People do so just to hope progress in everything they are engaged in. There is no fixed ways for the Double Ninth Cake, but
super cakes will have as many as nine layers, looking like a tower.
In 1989, the Chinese government decided the Double Ninth Festival as Seniors' Day. Since then, all government units,
organizations and streets communities will organize an autumn trip each year for those who have retired from their posts. At
the waterside or on the mountains, the seniors will find themselves merged into nature. Younger generations will bring elder
ones to suburban areas or send gifts to them on this day.
As early as 2,500 years ago, about the Spring and Autumn Period (770-476 BC), China had determined the point of Winter
Solstice by observing movements of the sun with a sundial. It is the earliest of the 24 seasonal division points. The time will be
each December 22 or 23 according to the Gregorian calendar.
The Northern hemisphere on this day experiences the shortest daytime and longest nighttime. After the Winter Solstice, days
will become longer and longer. As ancient Chinese thought, the yang, or muscular, positive things will become stronger and
stronger after this day, so it should be celebrated.
In some parts of Northern China, people eat dumpling soup on this day; while residents of some other places eat dumplings.
But in parts of South China, the whole family will get together to have a meal made of red-bean and glutinous rice to drive away
ghosts and other evil things. In other places, people also eat tangyuan, a kind of stuffed small dumpling ball made of glutinous
rice flour. The Winter Solstice rice dumplings could be used as sacrifices to ancestors, or gifts for friends and relatives. The
Taiwan people even keep the custom of offering nine-layer cakes to their ancestors. They make cakes in the shape of chicken,
duck, tortoise, pig, cow or sheep with glutinous rice flour and steam them on different layers of a pot. These animals all signify
auspiciousness in Chinese tradition. People of the same surname or family clan gather at their ancestral temples to worship
their ancestors in age order. After the sacrificial ceremony, there is always a grand banquet.
